Where have all the morals gone?

To be honest, when Anonymous commented on "A Smokers Always a Smoker When The Chips Are Down" when she (I know it's a she) said, " I'm sure you remember standing at that guys death bed, with only one lung and refusing to quit smoking" I wasn't sure what she was talking about. Then all of a sudden it hit me like a truck.

All these memories started flooding back to me. I remembered the smoke filled house, the guy, his mom, and even their dog. I remember playing outside with those little helicopter things that fall from trees. (Ya know, the things you can throw and they spin down) But most of all, I remember vowing never to smoke, which got me thinking. I remember all my "I will never..."s. Where have all the morals gone?

Maybe it's like those little helicopter things. It's a downward spiral. It starts out high, just like your hopes and falls down onto the dirty ground of realism. Or maybe, we are just floating until we figure out who we are, and where we want to land.

I am a Fag Enabler

Is that not the saddest thing you have ever seen? This poor little kid being dragged into this. This is at a protest outside of a fallen soldiers funeral. This group believes that all these people that died, did so because of our tolerance towards the gay community. (Right? Because we are so tolerant toward the gay community, aren't we?) And people who condone this are "fag enablers."

The leader of this church said that all people that died in the pentagon were probably "fags" and "dykes."

When did people become so concerned with who and who isn't going to hell? If I am going to burn in hell, that's my business. No one else's.

I am just so disturbed that anyone could have the audacity to protest a military funeral. This isn't something new to me, I've seen this before but I every time it just shakes me to the core. I don't have any family (or friends for that matter) in Iraq, and though I don't believe that war is the answer I still 100% support the people that fight in it. They need our support not our hatred.
And seriously, like the family isn't going through enough pain and suffering. The last thing they need is a bunch of inbred baptists trying to force feed their regurgitated beliefs down these grieving families throats.

Eh, I guess you can't have baptism without brainwashing.

"A Smokers Always a Smoker When The Chips Are Down"

Quitting smoking wasn't hard for me. It wasn't he nicotine I was addicted to, it was the consistency of it. Something stable when it felt like the rest of the world was crashing down. Though I remain in good health, I can see why someone (not me) would be willing to gamble their health away.

Not much stays the same, we are in a world that is constantly changing, evolving. We change everything- jobs, cars, styles, and most of us haven't been in a relationship that hasn't ended. And though you can't change your family they can certainly change on you.

Don't get me wrong. Change is often a good thing, but whether it's good or bad it's easy to be scared of. You will never be scared a cigarette is going to leave you, or that something hurt it. You will never love a cigarette.

This isn't just a poor girl trying to make excuses for her vices. This is just a changing girl trying to make sense of them.

A Cycle is a Cycle is a Cycle

I am frustrated and exhausted writing by dim light. I am aching for a cigarette, and I could use a stiff drink so bad I can almost smell the sour intoxication of whiskey. I just spent the last 45 minutes in my computer chair reading over old writing. A preservation of the past. Old note books, old blogs, anything I could get my hands on as long as I produced it. An undeniable narcissism. Stuck in my past, staring at pages stiffened with age, I see no advancement. Am I in Limbo?

I think about my accomplishments and wonder why it seems to be a never ending cycle. Even if I am not living it directly, I still feel like I am seeing it. A peripheral delusion.

Realizing, though I am incredibly flawed, that I am not entirely to blame. Realizations come through repetition, and in these old pages I see uncomfortable patterns. The focus of my complaints have landed on the same certain people, and I have finally found advancement in something. And though my complaints stay the same they have progressed into something more intelligent. A whining more thought out.

Who knows? Maybe it isn't me who is stuck in Limbo.

Dragons = Homosexuals

Since no one can take responsibility for their own actions there has been an ongoing attempt to blame others. Ya know, "It's not my fault I'm fat! McDonalds shouldn't make their burgers so tasty.." It's just ridiculous people being ridiculous people. With that said, what is our favorite thing to blame? Games! But not just any game. There is the one demon game that started it all: Dungeons and Dragons.

"After playing Advanced-Dungeons & Dragons, Marilyn Manson, the lesbian shock-rocker satanist, was inspired to build his own dungeon. Since the perverted rock-star was not able to obtain dragons, he populated it with the next-best thing: Homosexuals."

Dragons are equal to homosexuals.

Also quoted from the same site..

"D&D is called a “Role Playing Gaime” because players are encouraged to consider-alternative lifestyles, particularly gender-swapping. Men may play as women, and women play as men, having ‘adventures’ which quickly degrade into sex-orgies.

Dungeon-Masters encourage players to ‘act’ their part as much as possible. Most gaming sessions will involve nudity and copious actual or simulated gay-sex."

Now let me tell you, I am nerdy enough to have played D&D, and quite frankly.. It's the best sex I've ever had. Oh baby, I get so turned on when you talk about your +12 Staff. ;)

And yet there is more..

"STR FACT FILE: Has ‘Dungeons and Dragons’ been positively identified with ritual abuse and death? Yes. When players ‘die’ in D&D the game requires them to submit to some sort of forfeit- which usually involves some form of sexual humiliation but might involve committing a theft or murder."

That is EXACTLY right. Sexual humiliation at it's best. Last time I died, my dungeon master spit on me and called me scum, right before he tied me up to engage in some serious BDSM. - I still have whip marks to prove it.

I've said this once to your kind (that being ridiculous Right-Wings) and I will say it again. KNOCK IT THE FUCK OFF...

It's not just that you're ignorant it's that you're slowing down evolution, you stupid douches. We are taking ONE GIANT step BACKWARDS.

Praise be to Darwin. ;)

"I kissed a girl and I liked it"

So gay marriage is officially legal in California. One more state down. =)

It's nice to see your side losing. =)

Holy Delusion Batman!

Okay. Here is an update.



After some un-Christian-like words from a certain slutty, Warrior Jodie, I decided to comment this.



"Wow, what intelligent words. I have never heard a REAL Christian speak like such a slut."



Hehe.. To which Miss Warrior Jodie responded:

"Look here you piece of TRASH dont you EVER call me a slut. Just because I have a healthy NORMAL desire like any attractive woman SHOULD don’t make me a slut. You are probably just fat and ugly and ain’t had a penis near your dried up old twat in so long you got cobwebs."



Which is just SO true. I am so glad that she got all that from my one comment. I have never felt so connected to someone.



I also got a threatening response from someone named Deb.. Which goes something like that "Got some nerve calling people names like that when you don’t even know them. I guarantee you wouldn’t say anything like that about my friends to my face and be standing to tell about it."

Now, that is really harsh. I didn't say that I was a good Christian either though. I don't claim to be a good Christian girl, and then BRAG about being slutty. So, ya know, there's that.

And just for my readers amusement. I found this on their website as well:

"EVERY BODY knows that queers just want to spit in the Lords sweet face and that they don’t really care if they are married or not. It is all a big show so they can RUIN real marriages and piss off good CHRISTIAN people. They hate Jesus and they hate ANY THING in the bible so they figure before they go to HELL for being preverts they can mess things up for decent people. "

RIGHT! EVERYBODY knows.. That is exactly right.

Oh, and just for the record boys and girls:

I HOPE GAYS GET MARRIED.

Thanks. ;)

Republicans < Thinking for yourself

Okay, so I have obsessed myself with this Republican Faith Chat thing.. It's these backwards hicks who are super republican and completely ignorant. For example: (This is all copy and pasted from their website)

"REASONS WE HAVE TO VOTE FOR JOHN MCCAIN:

John McCain might be older than dirt and he probably gots ALZHEIMER but that is MUCH BETTER than being a terrorist. (Bloggers note: There is nothing like taken political advice from someone who says the word 'gots')

He likes war and that is good for the economy - they said so on FOX NEWS. (Bloggers note: And if Fox News said it must be true? Heaven for bid [and I mean that quite literally in this case] that we think for ourselves)

He hates murdering little fetus babys and that is OK to. (So long as a gal knows how to use a gallon of bleach, some Borax and a coat hanger then she don’t need no abortion clinics)" (Bloggers note: It's okay to kill babies with your at home baby-killing kit, bit not okay to have a professional do it? Self mutilation is okay in my book. It's the doctors that we need to stop)

Right? So.. Under another post entitled "The 'White' House is Call that for a Dang Reason!!!!" (The spelling error is not mine, but theirs. Just needed to point that out lol) one of the women wrote this: "OK, first off I ain’t prejudice. I’ve allowed plenty of black mens to rape me and never once call the police or Dateline or nothing. So I think that make me pretty open mind." Now, at first I thought it was a joke, because.. seriously? But my theory behind this is that the damn bitch is having sex outside of a marital status and that is such a big no-no that they "raped" her.

And I can't forget one of my favorite quotes:

"First off — any gal that uses a tampon like it SUPPOSED to be used is doing nothing short of cramming a cotton dildo up her hoo-hoo. Everyone know what they up to and that dangling string done change a dang thing. It’s a cotton pee-pee in your hoo-hoo so done pretend it ain’t!"

She's right. I actually look forward to my period, because I can't wait to use my cotton dildo. I thought I was fooling people. =/

So there you have it boys and girls. I don't necessarily have a problem with republicans, I respect everyone's opinion. If I was republican I would be SO mad..

I mean really.. Would you want that attached to your beliefs?

Insert Blog Title Here =)

I don't even know anymore. School is almost done for the quater which is great. That would be a great stress-reducer. Those classes make me want to cause physical harm to myself and those around me. It's not that the classes are bad, it's the people in them who pollute it with dumbass questions.

We have this one girl who talks faster than she can think and another one who is too old to be in school and has a REAL hard time grasping.. Well.. Anything.

Then there is the boy situation. I think I am annoying him.. which is great. Nothing says, "I love you" like someone obsessively clinging to you! He's great though, I just need to tone it down a bit and be a little less on the co-dependent side.

Then there is my family who makes me want to scream. I think (key word there) that they mean well but it's hard to tell.. The are really talented of secretly insulting you. The kind of insult where it is completely bitchy, but said in a way that you can't complain about it because they are being "nice."

Anyway, that's about it for now. Uninteresting but there it is. =D

And then there was me

So here it is. Starting a blog again. I should go cut myself and cry while I'm at it. Anyway, this one will be nice because of its detachment from the majority of the people I know. I suppose having an outlet would be some sort of therapeutic.

(sp>)Chickiepalooza, you are the only person I for-real know that has this address. So how unfortunate for you. lol

Anyway, I'm have awake waiting for a certain boy to come home. So, that's all for now. This is just my first blog that I feel obligated to write due to it opening up the screen and saying something along the lines of "Start Blogging" Go internet blog pressure.